Nope - I'm not talking about sex here HA HA I just felt the need to get some stuff off my chest.
Now maybe it's cause I'm on my period (yeah, too much information - I know) but I really feel lately like I'm allowing myself to be walked all over, and it's totally pissing me off because I feel like people think that they can do it and get away with it - and more so I'm pissed off because I LET them get away with it because I feel that if I said something then they would take that friendship away from me.
Yes, I know - If they are really my friends (or family, or whatever) they should accept anything that I may say - but I've had friends in the past who I thought were close friends just rip that friendship away without as much of an explanation. For stupid reasons - most of which were the fact that I had children and they didn't and felt like our lives were in "different places" - what the fuck ever!
Sorry, I'm ranting here - A LOT.
The latest was someone who seems to let me down on a fairly regular basis. I guess I'm just supposed to sit back and think that my feelings/plans/thoughts/expectations are less important than others. I don't know. But I let it happen, and happen again, and happen again... and not say a word because it'll bite me in the ass.
I guess the person I should be the most mad and disappointed with is myself. I very rarely ask anything of anyone (favours and all that) because I don't want to intrude. But I also don't speak up when someone has hurt or upset me (except DH of course haha)
I had to get all that out. I know it makes absolutely no sense to anyone out there reading it LOL but if I can't scream at the actual "party" involved, then I can at least get it out here
***edited to add;
I'm really sorry. I think that DH's shifts and stuff get to me sometimes too - makes me feel kind of all alone, so when the small glimmers of something out of the ordinary get completely screwed, I get upset.
I definitely know what single parenthood is like - only most of the time, single parents get every other weekend off ;)
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Twice in One Day?
Posted by Kelly at 11:14 AM
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6 comments:
Sorry to hear that you are being treated badly.
Believe it or not I used to be just like you. I got walked on and taken advantage of all the time.
I finally started putting my food down a couple of years ago, yes only a couple of years ago. I lent someone $1500 and they never paid me back. Then they proceeded to turn it around on me when I finally complained about it. It was at the moment that I decided I would never let someone take advantage of me again. I weeded all the negative people out of my life (leaving me with very little friends) and now I tell people exactly what I think. I don't bottle stuff up inside and I am very choosy who I associate with. I have started building relationships with positive people and my move to this town was the final step to moving on to a better life.
You are right though, if you speak up for yourself and they get resent it, they are not your friends.
Take us for example. I would never hold against you the fight we had. You were welcome to your opinions as I was mine. We expressed it, we took a break and we came back accepting each others thoughts. Just because people dont agree doesnt mean that cannot be friends. BUT you must respect each others right to form their own opinions and actions.
I hope things turn around and you start being treated as you should!
Thanks TM. I really just think it's the single parenthood/on my period making me crazy at the moment. Topped off with some stuff that happened this morning which ticked me off. God I love blogland ;)
i think you need to tell the people that are pissing you off to fuck off. that is all. that is what i do anyways LOL.
then go have a bowl of ice cream. :)
*huggles*
I don't like when you're upset. You're always so cheerful and uplifting. You don't deserve to be upset and sad. If there's anything I can do, you know where I am.
Poor thing. Having your period and then getting annoyed, never a good combo!
Sadly, it seems that those things have to happen hand in hand, though, doesn't it?
{huggles} and a wave from another Canadian city.
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